Robbery

Stupid Criminal Wears Plastic Bag Instead Of Ski Mask

by Spy Gadgets on January 5, 2011

: Image via Wikipedia

Most stupid criminals still have enough cells in their heads to know that it might be a good idea to hide their face during their crooked activities. Some wear a ski mask and some use other cleaver ways to disguise themselves – this moron takes the the stupid crown this week:

Our buddies at ocweekly tell the story of a ineffective robber whose normal dumb behavior was to attempt his bumbling crimes by wearing a see-though plastic bag on his head.

During one of his hold-ups at a Wendy’s drive-thru, the employee just shut the window and walked away after not taking the guy seriously.

Again at another time, the guy tried another unsuccessful “plastic bag on the head” robbery at a Jack-In-The-Box. The police were called and while on the way to the scene of the attempted crime, a police officer spotted the dumb dude (complete with bag on the head) walking into the gas station.

Yes, if your wondering – he got caught this time!

Police charged David Brian Mattson, with 12 attempted robberies and–get this–a single successful one!

Stay Puft Marshmallow Man Ski Mask (geektyrant.com)
2nd suspect in NW Houston store robbery still on the run (chron.com)
Hairy Business Ventures – ‘Beardski’ Bearded Ski Masks Would Make ZZ Top Proud (GALLERY) (trendhunter.com)
Woman reports being robbed at Iowa City apartment (thegazette.com)
Fewer plastic shopping bags handed out (cbc.ca)

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Stupid criminal ran from pastry

by Spy Gadgets on December 1, 2010

: Image via Wikipedia

This stupid criminal was scared of a little pastry flying at him! In Deming, New Mexico police said a clerk foiled a would-be robber when she hit him on the back of the head with a package of empanadas (a type of Latin American pastry).

When he grabbed the cash register at Amigo’s Mexican Food Inc. and tried to flee, he didn’t say a word but he dropped the register when the clerk threw the pastry and hit him.

Barbara Orquiz, who owns Amigo’s with her husband, Arnold, said the cord caught when the man tried to take the register.

Arnold Orquiz said the clerk saw him grab it, screamed and got him with the empanadas. Barbara Orquiz said he was covering his head as he ran away.

Review: Kings of Pastry (thestar.com)
WNWDW: Robber foiled by pastry-wielding cashier (newslite.tv)

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Stupid tattoo gives dumb criminal away

by Spy Gadgets on October 21, 2010

“Stupid” was written all over his face when this criminal from South Florida was arrested (well, “Stupid” wasn’t actually written on his face but, “I’m Me” was). Why he had that phrase permanently engraved on this ugly head is not known but what is known is that the tattoo is what helped police find and arrest him.

Police say 19-year-old Joseph Eric Williams began his crime spree on August 20, and that he has robbed as many as 15 AT&T stores in the past two months. Williams would walk into the store and quickly grab two or three $600 iPhones from the display then take off running.

The Broward Sheriff’s Office said Williams was in custody Wednesday, after the tattoo on his head led police right to him – a $1,000 CrimeStoppers reward led to a phoned-in tip (“Yeah, I know that phone thief that you’re looking for – he lives down the street from me – just look for the moron with “I’m me” tattooed on his face!”).

He faces at least four counts of grand theft and is being held on $13,000 bond.